Best Show Topic


"Earn Your Beard"

First discussed:


Most recently discussed:


For several weeks in 2011, Earn Your Beard was a topic on the table. In this game, bearded callers had a chance to justify, through their circumstances and life stories, whether they had earned the right to grow a beard. Applicants earning 5 points on the Beardometer were judged beardworthy.

Criteria Known to Have Earned Beard PointsEdit

  • Being named Gordon
  • Being over 35 years of age  
  • Being frustrated in one's occupation
  • Being a self-described vegetarian/neo-hippie
  • Being an unemployed steamfitter (+2)
  • Being in a bagpipe band
  • Being lost in the woods for 8 hours on a hike
  • Being Canadian
  • Having gone on an 8-mile hike.

Criteria Known to Have Caused the Loss of Beard PointsEdit

  • Being 28 years of age or younger
  • Being a 24-year-old stand-up comic
  • Looking like Brian Wilson
  • Being from Brooklyn (-3 points)
  • Having a beard resembling that of Trey Anastasio from Phish
  • Being a jam band fan who wears Birkenstocks

Episodes featuring "Earn Your Beard"Edit

December 13, 2011

January 10, 2012